Failure. Disappointment. Guilt. Shame.

Homily – Third Sunday of Easter – April 19, 2015

Failure.  Disappointment.  Guilt.  Shame.

Strong emotions, all of them.  We’ve all felt them at one time or another.  We’ve felt them when we’ve let down a friend, failed to challenge an inappropriate comment or joke, told a convenient lie instead of an inconvenient truth, or broken a solemn oath.  Most of the time, we are our own harshest critics.

In today’s gospel, the apostles are in a funk.  For three years now, they have been following Jesus, eating with him, listening to him, watching in amazement as he heals the sick, gives sight to the blind, raises the dead back to life.  They see him ride into Jerusalem on a donkey to the shouts of Hosanna, fronds of palms thrown down ahead of him, covering the dusty road up into the Holy City.  All of their hopes are rising.  Then the unthinkable happens!  Jesus is betrayed, arrested, scourged, and crucified.  He dies on the cross, and is hurriedly buried.  As their master is laying down his life, they abandon him, run away from him, deny they ever knew him.

Now, they are together in the Cenacle, the upper room where they shared their last meal together three days ago, hiding, afraid.  There is talk of some women having seen the risen Lord, but, perhaps because of their own self-recriminations, they are still fearful, worried that the authorities will choose to similarly end their lives, feeling guilt and shame.

Then, two of the disciples, Cleophas, a cousin of Jesus, and an unnamed companion rush into the room.. They have seen Jesus alive, spoken to him, broken bread with him. The eleven are puzzled, not sure what to think.  Then Jesus is there in their midst.  “Peace be with you!”  He sees the frightened look on their faces, reads the doubts in their hearts, and assures them that they are not seeing a ghost.  He shows them the holes in his feet and hands, and eats with them. 

Just as he did with the companions on the road, he breaks open the Law and the Prophets, opens their eyes to all that was foretold about him, and explains that what had happened was not a failure but a triumph.  He ends his appearance by telling them of their new mission, preaching to all of the world of repentance, for the forgiveness of sins.

  

In light of all of this, how are we to proceed?  What are we to make of our failures, our disappointments, our guilt, our shame?  We are to be disciples of the Lord.  Although they were sinners, they were forgiven by Jesus.  Although they ran from him in his great need, he ate with them, taught them, allayed their fears.  And in the end, emboldened by the Holy Spirit, they spread his message to the world, laying down their lives as a testimony to their beliefs.

We, like them, are forgiven by the Lord for our failures, not in person, but in Persona Christi.   By confessing our sins to the priest, it is Jesus himself, through the priest, who forgives us with the words of absolution.

We, like the disciples, are fed by the Lord.  Not by mere food, which a persons eats and hungers again.  We are fed by Jesus with his very Body and Blood, in the Eucharist.  Just as they saw the resurrected Lord, and still doubted, some of us still walk to the altar, thinking that what they are about to receive is mere bread and wine, when in truth, it is Jesus himself.  When we feel the doubts rising in our hearts, we can sit before Him, in adoration.  We can feel his warm embrace, experience his calming presence, hear his words in our hearts, “Be not afraid”.

We, like the disciples, must spread the Good News, proclaiming the Mercy shown by the Lord in our own lives.